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The House That Never Sold

So I just wrote my first blog ever, and I was rather proud of it. Took me forever. Blood, sweat, and tears. No, not really.  But after I proudly handed the blog to my husband, his first comment was,”Great, can’t wait for next week’s blog.”  What?! I have to write one every week? Damn. So, I jokingly asked my seven-year-old what she would write about, if she was writing a blog. Her response was a story about a lonely dog. I explained that the blog had to be about real estate. After a very puzzled look, she said, “I know! The house that never sold!”.  Well, now you’re onto something, kid. So then I asked her why this house never would sell. She responded that the house had bird poop all over it, all of the paintings had eyes that would watch you, the walls were all purple and black, and the fireplace would start fires by itself.  Of course the first thing that came to my mind was that movie Amityville Horror. “GET OUT!!!”.  But I digress. There are definitely a lot of legitimate reasons why houses on the market won’t sell. Here I will discuss a couple of those reasons, and hopefully give you a few good solutions.

     Here is a scenario that realtors hear quite often. Your house has been on the market for several months, and no one has even put in an offer. Of course there could be lots of reasons for this.  Some reasons are quite simple to rectify, such as your house is overpriced.  Other reasons take a little more thought and patience. The first problem that comes to my mind is offensive smells. We have all heard of nose blindness from that commercial. It is a real thing, people. You might think that your house smells like roses, but a buyer might walk in and want to throw up everywhere. Do you have pets? Is your house really as clean as it could be? Are you trying to preserve aunt Sally’s fur coat with excessive mothballs? These are all offensive smells that may not be apparent to you! It may be hard to hear, but ask your friends and family if this may be the issue. If it is, it may be in your best interest to hire a professional maid service. Or maybe put the dog outside while the house is being shown. And I promise you that aunt Sally’s coat will survive without 7000 mothballs.

    Another major issue that can keep your house from selling is poor personal decorating choices. For instance, most people do not find a different neon color painted in every room appealing. This is not Central America for god’s sake. Or maybe you really love floral wallpaper. You are probably the only one. And you know that man cave with the 17 deer heads? Take those damn things off the wall. You’re scaring people. And we are super happy for you that Alabama football is so important to you (ROLL TIDE). But you don’t need an entire room dedicated to it. Therefore, paint those bright colored walls a neutral trendy color. It’s best to paint most walls in the house the same color. Take the scary deer heads off the wall and put them in the attic. Or maybe just throw them away? And you can be a football fanatic in your next house, turn that room into something more normal.

     So here’s the good news: most superficial reasons that houses won’t sell can be easily fixed. If you can stand some constructive criticism, just ask your friends or realtor from the Henry Group! Here’s the bad news: if your house has paintings where the eyes follow you, or your fireplace starts fires on its own, you might (definitely) have a ghost. If so, I suggest you get a priest to do an exorcism, or just leave that house immediately. Good luck!

Written by: Helen Henry

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